Hello readers!
I don’t usually like to post about something I don’t have the answer to yet, but I think many great things will come through this post…
For me, oftentimes there is anxiety is not knowing what is next.I am a planner. I like to have/figure out all the details. I like knowing all the things. I collect data. I observe. I see things that are often over-looked. Can anyone relate?
I am currently in a season of many things here at CGA, but one of them is “not knowing what is next,” but the funny thing is that I am okay with that. There is beauty in not knowing and peace in the waiting and anticipation. I am learning to trust the Lord in new ways.
In all staff worship a few weeks ago I had a few people pray for me because we were asked to raise our hands if we were having a hard time trusting the Lord. 4 people surrounded me and during the time of prayer, Abigail was noticing that I was standing with my hands faced palm side up, and she said that this was a posture of receiving and not being comfortable. God doesn’t call us to be comfortable, he calls us to action. I don’t know about you, but when I am comfortable where I am, then I am less likely to take action. It is good to step into uncomfortability from time to time.
This is also a season of “rest” in the physical aspect. I wrote a blog last week about being a busy body. I am in a place where I am allowing him to do things while I am not doing, and not feeling guilty for it, but rather feeling freedom.
It was prophesied over me in the beginning of this semester that I needed to just be fully present in this season and not try to figure everything out. So, I am positioning myself to hear directly from Him (aka solitude and silence at least once a week for extended period of time), because I am expecting him to act on my behalf. In the past I have often tried and failed many times to take things into my own hands and I end up getting ahead of God, and so then I get frustrated when things don’t turn out like I planned.
So, here’s to relinquishing control, trusting in His timing, going where He leads me, and enjoying the journey!
Keep Lookin’ Up,
Misha
p.s. Update: I will only be doing two semesters at the C.G.A., which ends the end of August/early September. We’ll see what He has for me after that.
